Pretty Derby’s Here to Make You a Tamagotchi on Steroids™!​​

​TL;DR:​​ This ain’t yer grandma’s pony simulator. Breed, train, and roast 60+ glow-up horsegirls—some faster than your WiFi, others drama-ier than a Kardashian reunion. Free trial? Yeah, but your heart’ll break harder than a ​Triple Crown underdog.

What’s Crackin’?​​
​Horsegirl Hotness™​
Adopt Special Week (the “I’m gonna win or die tryin’” type) or Silent Strider (the “I’ll sprint through a typhoon” legend). 60+ cuties—each with more personality than a ​TikTok algorithm. Train ’em, flirt ’em, or ”accidentally” sell ’em to fund your ”cinnamon bun empire”.

​3D Models So Sharp They’ll Cut Your Wi-Fi​
Watch 18 horsegirls sprint like they’re escaping ”TikTok fame or death”. Zoomies, hair flips, and ”why is her tail on fire?!”—all rendered smoother than your ex’s excuses.

​Victory Concerts: LOUDER THAN YOUR ALARMS​
Win races, then watch ’em perform ”Equestrian EDM” with pyrotechnics hotter than a ​Florida summer. Features include:

• ”Lip-Sync Battles” (they’re 10% talent, 90% ”I paid for this wig”)
• ”Fan Service Overload” (sparkles, poses, and ”why is she winking?!”)

​Race Modes Wilder Than a Horsegirl on Red Bull​

• ​Gem Grab-a-Thon (3v3):​​ Fight for bling while your horsegirl yells ”I GOT THE BLING! WOO!”
• ​Mud-Slingin’ Madness:​​ Survive swampy tracks where ”horsepower meets horse-poo”.
• ​Boss Battles:​​ Defeat ”Ultra Mega Ultra Rare Legend Horsegirl” (spoiler: she’s just ”Special Week but OP”).

​Customize Your Chaos​
Mix ”speed demon” genes with ”idol vibes”. Unlock outfits hotter than a ​gas station sushi roll:

• ”Rodeo Queen” (cowgirl hat + glitter hooves)
• ”Cyberpunk Mare” (neon mane + laser reins)

​Features That’ll Make Your Friends Jealous:​​

• ​Daily Drip:​​ Wake up, feed hay, scream when ”your fave gets injured”. ”Monday: Train. Tuesday: Cry. Wednesday: ???”
• ​Horsegirl Gossip:​​ Flirt, roast, or ”accidentally” start a fandom war. ”Why does Silence Suzuka hate my playlist?!”
• ​Global Brainstorm:​​ Race maniacs worldwide. ”Hey, that’s not a track—it’s Norway!”
• ​Custom Playlists:​​ Name ’em ”Retirement Home Rock” or ”Pandemic Bae Anthems”.

​Bullet Comments: Roast the Racers​
Drop ”Your horsegirl’s speed is slower than my WiFi” mid-race. Flex your ”I bred a unicorn” ego (even if you can’t).

​UP Master—Be the Next Horsegirl Tycoon​
Follow creators who turn ”oops, I broke her leg” into ”LOL, I planned that”. Their content’s hotter than a ​horsegirl-themed anime.

WhyPretty Derby**’s Your New Obsession:​**​

• ​No Friends Needed (But They’d Cry)​: Solo grind or drag your BFF into ”why did I spend $200 on this?”
• ​All Your Horsegirl Feeds in One Spot: Drama, glitter, and ”why did I save this?”
• ​Global Brainwashing: Play with normies and maniacs worldwide.
• ​Free Trials:​​ Yeah, but ”accidentally” subscribing is easier than ”accidentally” liking your ex’s post.

​Requirements (Translation for Normies):​​

• ​OS:​​ iOS/Android (anything post-2018, aka no flip phones that think ”app” is soup).
• ​RAM:​​ 4GB or more (yes, even your grandma’s phone can handle ”Horsegirl Armageddon”).
• ​Screen:​​ 6 inches or smaller (big screens? Overrated—we’re here for the ”glance-and-crash”).

Final Vibe:​​
This app’s your digital ”horsegirl buffet”—minus the oats, plus 10x more existential crises. Whether you’re a scrub, a scrublord, or someone who just wants to flex ”I turned a potato into a racehorse”, ​Pretty Derby’s got your six. Download, drip, repeat.

(Disclaimer: If you rage-quit, blame the RNG. Or your inability to tell a “Special Week” from a “space pony.”)