LINEAGE W – WHERE 24 YEARS OF NOSTALGIA MEET YOUR NEW ADDICTION​
(Free-to-play (but we’ll guilt trip u into buying a “legendary” sword named “Chad’s Spatula”))

​TL;DR (BECAUSE U CAN’T BE BOTHERED TO READ ALL THIS)​​

Play as a knight, mage, or fairy who’s been stuck in a time loop since 1998. Fight dragons, build “blood brotherhoods” (aka group chats), and farm loot for 100+ hours. Spoiler: The real boss is your caffeine addiction.

​WHY PLAY? (SPOILER: U WON’T)​​

• ​​“Epic” Lore: Relive 24 years of Lineage history… but in HD! Now with 50% more pixels and 100% more grumpy dwarves. “I’ll just Google ‘how to beat this boss’!”
• ​Class Chaos: Pick your destiny! Be a Paladin (meat shield), Elven Archer (sniper who cries when it rains), or Dark Wizard (guy who fails fireballs 90% of the time).
• ​Global Chaos: Fight Koreans, Germans, and Brazilians in massive sieges! “GG EZ, no cap!” (Translation: “I’ll just AFK farm and blame lag.”)

​FEATURES (OR LIES THEY SOLD U)​​

​1. “New” Engine (Same Old Trash)​​

• Play with a “revolutionary” 3rd-person view that’s just a fancy way to hide your lack of aiming skills. “Why can’t I see my horse?!”
• “Massive” sieges where 100 players spam fireballs like toddlers throwing tantrums. “Victory is a 1% DPS increase!”

​2. Blood Brotherhoods (A.K.A. Group Chat Drama)​​

• Form clans with players who’ll betray u for a shiny locket. “Bro, let’s strategize!” (Translation: “I’ll afk while u carry me.”)
• Trade loot like it’s a garage sale. “Anyone wanna buy my +1 sword? It’s only been used once!”

​3. AI Translation (aka Robot Friends)​​

• Chat with players in Korea using AI that turns “Hello” into “Potato monster attack!” “Why r u speaking emoji?!”

WHY IT’S A SINKING SHIP (BUT U’LL STILL PLAY)​​

• ​No Paywall? Lie.​​ Want a “legendary” mount? Pay $5! “It’s just a reskin of a chicken!”
• ​Server Meltdowns: Lag spikes so bad, your horse teleports to the boss arena. “I’ll screenshot this for Twitter!”
• ​Logic? Nah: The “final boss” is a dragon that’s just a glorified Roomba. “GG, I guess?”

​HOW TO LOSE HOURS (AND SANITY)​​

1. ​Farm Loot: Grind 100 hours for a sword that does 0.5 damage. “Victory is a placebo!”
2. ​Join Clan Wars: Fight other clans… who are all AFK farming potatoes. “This is fun, right?”
3. ​Buy the “Full Game”​: Already did? Too bad! The “full” game is just more grind and microtransactions.

​DOWNLOAD NOW!​​
(But don’t blame us when ur life becomes a grindy loop of sieges, caffeine crashes, and buyer’s remorse.)

DEV NOTES:

• Made by interns who hate weekends.
• Art stolen from a 2005 MMORPG. “We added glitter! It’s ‘epic’!”
• Testing team quit after Week 1. “We’re not paid enough to deal with Koreans.”